We'll go by paragraphs.

My charger to my computer has been out of commission for a bit so I haven't been able to blog as much as I would like. Now that I have my charger, you guys will be glad to know that I have been taking note of my days and jotted down some interesting things to blog about. I'm going to knock them all out in one blog. This is what the note reads:

THINGS TO BLOG
*The half of a deviled egg sold at Merphy's Deli
*Hipster Hunting
*Pregnant homeless man
*My fortune cookie that was empty
*Recent nail biting
*Artificial sweetener in my coffee this morning
*How the soap that the car wash smelled better than my shampoo
*Trident gum w/ layers commercial

We'll go by paragraphs.

The whole individual half of a deviled egg being sold threw me off one day before work. While I was looking for a cheap breakfast taco one morning, I strolled into Merphy's Deli downtown on Congress. I never go in there because of how overly priced they are but I figured as desperate I was for some damn black beans, I'd give it a shot. It was a cute set up and smelled nice and when I saw that they had breakfast taco's for $2, I let out a sigh of relief. So there I was, a whole person, waiting in line to order my whole breakfast taco and I look down and they are selling half a deviled egg. Never have I ever. THEN, it pissed me off when I looked at the bottom of it to find out the price was a whole dollar. The day before I'd bought a whole dozen eggs for 99 cents (less than a whole dollar)! Anyways, the moral of this story iiiiiiiiis: Never trust a guy with hairy legs.

I have been trying to understand what a hipster is for a while now and I'm getting better at it. If you don't know what a hipster is either, then A; you yourself are a hipster or B; you better start studying now because it takes a good long time before you can accurately point your finger at a hipster. Hipsters are very questionable creatures. Many qualities make up a true hipster and when I feel I am able to undoubtedly distinguish one without fault, then, only then will I be able to take over Russia. To insure this stays in line with my future plans, I went hipster hunting.

The red head could almost be a hipster but I think hipster can only hang out with other hipsters.
I think...

Ok, So this one has a classic hipster bag and clearly doesn't care that I'm taking her picture.


This one, I totally has the hipster posture and I'm thinking the denim jacket tops it off.

These two I'm not sure. The guy is trying too hard which in fact, makes you not a hipster.
(see, it's hard!)

I think these two exemplify what I was trying to capture on my hunt.
Immediately after this picture was taken the 2 suspects were taken into custody and tortured by the Prime Minister of Narnia.

I'm pretty sure I saw a homeless man wearing a maternity belly under his clothes. I was briefly concerned.

I'm always excited to get fortune cookies. One day (at band camp) a while ago, I made all my friends open theirs first because I wanted to save the best for last. When it got to my turn, I didn't have a fortune in my cookie. I was scared.

I have started biting my nails again.

After not using artificial sweetener for 6 months, you can totally taste the difference. I had to make a new cup of coffee.

I rode past a car wash on my bike the other day. The one right on Congress and Riverside to be exact. The soap for the cars smelled so strong it almost hurt. Why on earth do you need fragrance in you car soap? Some people don't even like fragrance for their body soap. Man alive people, first half a deviled egg, now this! Straight madness. So this is what I have to say to all those people with the good smelling car exteriors: When I take over Russia and turn all of their army into my personal ninja ballerina minions, I'm coming for you. Coming for you and those damn hipsters full force. My advice to you is to invent a new drug that makes you invisible and impenetrable. Thank you bye.


And now, watch this.